


All Too Well

by Justadeangirl67



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Broken Reader, Dean Winchester - Freeform, Emotionally Hurt Dean Winchester, F/M, Reader-Insert, Sam Winchester - Freeform, Supernatural Season 4, bobby singer (briefly) - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-19
Updated: 2018-07-19
Packaged: 2019-06-13 00:40:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15352407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Justadeangirl67/pseuds/Justadeangirl67
Summary: Dean comes back from Hell with only one thing on his mind, you. He knows if Sam didn't make a deal to bring it him it had to be you, but you're not the same person he left.(Reader-insert for start of season 4 when Dean comes back from Hell.)





	All Too Well

**Author's Note:**

> Reader-insert for start of season 4 when Dean comes back from Hell. I've had this idea in my head for a while. I always wondered what it would be like if Dean had something to come back to in season 4 besides Sam. This is how the reader had changed after losing him. . I don't know if I will make this a small series or not. I guess depends on my mood and if everyone really wants more. I did leave it open for more because I have a problem and I can't just focus on one fic at a time.
> 
> **As always my fics are not to be saved, copied or posted on any other site without my express written persmission. Thanks!**

Dean slides into the front seat of the Impala and runs his hands over the steering wheel, “Hey, baby. Miss me?” He grins and looks over at Sam and Bobby to find them staring at him. His smile drops a little, and he clears his throat slipping the key in the ignition. “Okay. First thing is first. I need a burger and I need to see Y/n. If you two didn’t bring me back I have a feeling she did. So where does she stay while you’re getting some private time with that brunette. Which I have to say Sammy, nice.” He wiggles his eyebrows.

Sam glances at Bobby who nods towards Dean, “Tell him Sam.”

He looks back at Dean and sighs, “I don’t know where she is, Dean.”

Dean could feel his heart drop into his stomach. No, this isn’t how this is supposed to go. Sam was supposed to watch her and keep her safe. She was just at some shit motel or hold up in some house. With other hunters keeping her safe while Sam was busy. He takes a deep breath to calm down and looks at Bobby who was avoiding his eyes and back at Sam.

Fucking hell.

He yanks the key out of the car and gets out of the car slamming the door behind him. "What the hell do you mean you don't know where she is Sammy?!” He shouts at the younger Winchester. “I told you to take care of her!”

"She didn't want me to take care of her, Dean! She wanted you!” Sam argues.  “I woke up a week after we buried you and she was gone. I tried to find her. Bobby did too. You know if she doesn't want to be found she isn't going to be."

Dean groans and leans his head on the top of the Impala. Sam was right. If she doesn’t want to be found she won’t be. It was one of the things she was best at. Getting in, doing the job and disappearing before anyone knew what hit them but she promised she wouldn’t hunt anymore. She promised she would stop and be normal.

He stands up and yanks the door open, Get in the car Sam. I know how to find her. I know everything about her stubborn ass. Where did you last see her?"

* * *

 

This pounding in her head wouldn't go away. It just kept hammering on. That’s what she gets for drinking until she passed out. It almost seemed to get louder the more she tried to avoid it. She pulls the shitty motel pillow over her eyes, trying to block out the noise in her head. She just needed to sleep for a few more hours.  

"Open the door!"

Fuck.

The pounding wasn’t in her head. She pulls the pillow from her face, grabbing the gun she keeps under the pillow next to her. No one knew where she was. She had made sure of that. So, whoever this was it wasn't a friendly visit. Not that she had friends anymore. Or relationships of any kind for that matter. They all died when Dean died.

She pulls a tight black tank top on over her bare chest and slowly makes her way to the door. She slides the curtain back with the tip of her gun to see Sam's shaggy hair and throws her back groaning, "Shit. How the hell did he find me?”   

She walks back to the door and pulls the chain off, whipping the door open, "How did yo-" her words are caught in her throat the second her eyes focus on the man standing before her. Dean Winchester. The love of her life. Her best friend. Alive.

Dean smiles at her evident shock. "Hey, sweetheart."

There was no way it was him. She watched the hellhounds tear him apart and all she could do was watch helplessly. She could still hear him screaming.

_‘Y/n, run baby! Run! Don’t fucking touch her! She isn’t a part of this!’_

A year later and it was just as loud as the night it happened. She looks over his body. From what she could see there were no marks. No scars. It was impossible.  He didn’t have a body to come back to. This wasn’t him.

Sam watches her hand slide behind her, reaching for what seems to be a knife. He puts up his hands to stop her. "Woah, woah, woah. It's really him. We did all the tests. It's really him Y/n."

She looks back at Dean eyeing him carefully. If she was the same girl she was a year ago she would have jumped into his arms, flung her arms around him and held on for dear life. She wasn't that girl anymore though. She takes a step back and opens the door to let them in, finally giving them a view of her black cotton booty shorts and tiny black tank top. Definitely not the same girl.

"So, what are you doing here?” she asks as she walks back to the bed, quickly slipping her necklace into her shirt. Dean didn't need to see she was still wearing his ring on a chain. It's not like they could just go back to the way things were anyway. Whatever they were to each other died the night he did.

Dean takes a step into the room carefully eyeing the mess she was living in. Pissed. He was pissed. Her room was covered in fast food, liquor bottles, and what looked like shit from several different cases. He clears his throat to hide the hurt. Here she was acting like nothing happened. As if he was just another hunter she used to work with. Like they don't have a history. She didn’t even seem to be happy he was alive and that hurt more than he would ever admit out loud. He looks back at Sam before he comes in and puts a hand to his chest, stopping him from coming in, "No, dude. She's practically naked."

Sam looks at her and then Dean. "Really Dean? I’ve cleaned up the gunshot wound to her shoulder and the time she broke her ribs. I’ve seen her with less clothes on."

Dean glares at Sam until he finally throws his hands up in surrender and walks back to the Impala. Dean turns back around and looks at her, kicking a few empty whiskey bottles out of his way, "What are you doing? Hunting by yourself? You know better than that. I didn't want you out here hunting alone. Hell, I didn't want you hunting at all!"

She shrugs carelessly as she snaps her safety on and sets her 9mm. on the bed.  "Yeah, well, I didn't want you to make that deal. Guess this makes us even.”

The way she looked at him made him want to be back in the box he crawled out of. It was like she was empty. Like she didn’t care about anything but the job. She was acting like him and he fucking hated it. Hated it with everything in him and it was all his fault. He left her alone in this shithole world. He left her alone when she begged him not to.

They didn’t have time for this. He could be pissed at her after he got her out of this deal. He had to know how much time she got and find a way to stop it. He steps towards her trying to keep his fear pushed down.

"What did it take huh? They wanted me pretty bad so six months? What, huh?!" He shouts. Dean always yelled when he couldn't handle his emotions. It was just how he was built, and she knew that. It used to bother her. She hated upsetting him but a year of living without him changes a lot of things.

She smirks and crosses her arms over her chest, "You think I made a deal to bring you back?"

"Sam didn't. Bobby didn't. That leaves you sweetheart." No one else gave enough of a shit about him to make a deal for him. It had to be her.

She shakes her head, "I didn't, and wont, make a deal for you Dean. You wanted to be dead so badly who the fuck was I to argue with you?!" Just the love of life you once but I guess that doesn't mean shit, she thinks.

"I wasn't going to waste ten years on a deal for you."

He didn't know what to do. He didn’t know how to talk to this, this _person._ This wasn't like her. This wasn't the girl he knew. The girl he loved. The sweet girl who had hope. The girl who told him everything would work out as long as they have each other. That all the good they were doing meant something and they would make in work. In the end they would have each other and that was all that mattered.

"What the hell happened to you while I was gone?” he begs. “I don't even know who you are. You’re definitely not my girl.”

Her smirk slowly fades, and she take a step towards him meeting those pretty green eyes she used to get lost in so easily. "You happened, Dean. The girl you knew died the moment she had to bury the love of her life." She bites the inside of her cheek to keep herself from crying. "If you wanted her back you may as well leave. She's long, long gone."

He takes a deep breath and clenches his fists. He couldn’t deal with this right now. If something pulled him out, the same thing could be after her and he would be damned if something was going to hurt her now that he was back. “I get you’re pissed at me,” he admits. “I really do. I fucked up and left you alone and I know, _I know,_ how much that hurt you, but if you didn’t bring me back we need to figure out who did. This isn’t just about me and you anymore. Something big is happening and we need to be a head of it for once.”

She shrugs like she couldn’t be bothered to care. “Don’t know who brought you back but I am sure the big, bad Winchester brothers will figure out it.” She points to the door on the way to the bathroom. “Shut that on your way out. I’ve got a case so I’m a bit busy.”

He huffs out a hollow laugh. “So that’s it? Just send me on my way?”

“What am I supposed to do Dean? Throw you a party?”

He shakes his head and hangs his head in defeat. “You know, I thought you every single day I was down there,” he chokes out. “You were the only thing that kept me from completely losing it. The second I was topside all I wanted to do was find you and Sammy. That’s it. I’m itching to touch you, feel your skin under my hands just one more time and you want nothing to do with me?”

“I don’t know what you want me to say Dean. I’m not your girl anymore but I’m glad I could help while you were down.” She keeps her back towards him and reaches up clutching the necklace hiding in her shirt. She takes a deep breath, forcing every drop of emotion out of her before continuing, “You should get going. Figure out what pulled you out before it comes looking for you.” She peeks over her shoulder at him, “See you around Dean.” She walked into the tiny, shit hole bathroom and waited until she heard the door to her room close before she collasped on the floor and broke down in tears. She couldn't watch him die again. She was stupid to believe she could ever have a happy ending in this life. Dean was better off without her in his way. 

The door to the Impala creeks loudly as Dean opens it and slips into the front seat. Sam looks at him and back towards the motel, frowning at no sign of Y/n. “Where is Y/n? Getting her bag?” He asks looking back at Dean.

Dean starts up the car and shifts aggressively into reverse, “She’s not coming. We’re on our own.” He peels out of the parking lot white knuckling the wheel. He could see Sam shifting uncomfortably, waiting for the right time to say something but he put a stop to it before it began. He keeps his eyes on the road and warns, “Don’t. Don’t ask me about Y/n. Ever again. Don’t even say her name. Let’s just figure out who the hell pulled me out.”

Sam looks out his side mirror at the motel getting smaller and smaller in the distance but doesn’t bring her up. “Bobby’s had his nose in the books since we left. We can see if he’s got a lead on what we’re with.”

“Sounds great. I love research. I can’t friggin’ wait.” He leans forward and turns the radio up before Sam could say another word. As soon as he figured out who pulled him out everything could go back to normal. He just needed a few days. Time to think. _She_ just needed more time.

Everything would be fine once he got her home. Just a few more days.


End file.
